...and I do too!

When SOMETHING means a lot to you, you want to share about it, right?

When SOMEONE means a lot to you, you are proud to talk about that person to others and share how much you love them, right?

When OTHERS mean a lot to you, you want to share with them things that will help their life, right?

Reason I say all of this is because yesterday I really did some thinking. About an hour before my work day ended, I had two customers sit down at my desk that I had the opportunity of talking to for a considerable amount of time. Our small talk ranged from my "easy button" on my desk, to the chairs at Cracker Barrell, credit card fraud and weight loss.

As you all know, weight loss and better health means a lot to me and in turn I find myself always wanting to share. I've mastered turning any conversation into one concerning weight loss and how it really is possible to conquer obesity. Someone could walk up and be like, "Did you know your car is getting towed," and I wouldn't be shocked if I responded with, "Really? Well did you know that one year ago my life was being towed away because my body was broke down, beat up and just in the wrong place." Okay, maybe that's not too realistic, but I think you get the point.

Well, ironically enough, we ended up talking about the "Biggest Loser" competition I'm hosting at work and how I've lost 122 lbs in one year. Both of them gave their "Congrats!" and proceeded to joke about how they could lose a few pounds. The usual questions were asked:

"Did you have surgery?"
"Are you on any kind of diet plan?"
"How did you do that?"

Then I proceeded to pull out the KC Fit Mag and show them my "Halfway There" article (perfect reading material while a customer waits...lol). That's the point of the conversation where it took a pivotal turn that gave me chills - a dose of numbing REALITY.

The gentlemen states, "Wow! You must feel a whole lot better?"

"OH YES!" Then I pulled up my previous blog and read off the daily struggles I faced prior to making it this far...

· Had excruciating heel spurs

· Severe acid reflux and indigestion

· Lower AND upper back pain

· Knee/joint pain

· Restless sleep

· Daytime wheezing

· Shortness of breathe

· Inability to stand for extended periods of time w/o pain

· Abnormal fears of death at night (from weight related risks: heart attack; stroke; suffocation from excess weight around neck as I laid down; sleep apnea; aneurysm - I always feared no one would find me and paramedics would have excess struggle to revive me due to weight)

I watched as this couple turned to emotionally look at one another while nodding, then slowly dropped their heads towards the ground. It was like the breathe was taken out of EACH of them in that moment. The wife, who weighs what my article weight was, broke her silent gaze by saying with a cracking voice, "Yep, I understand, I completely understand." Then the husband, weighing mid-300's, politely interrupted his wife with watery eyes by saying, "We just lost our daughter in November. She had a blood clot in her leg that moved up to her heart. She was 33." The wife finished by softly saying, "She was a bit...well, chunkier and she experienced every single one of those symptoms you just listed *pause* ...and I do too!"

It was like a million bricks fell into my lap all at once and I got chills as I replied with, "Oh no! I'm so sorry to hear about your loss." The wife smiled back at me and said, "Oh no, you're fine! I just got chills. It just really hit home and well...wow...it's so true. I know we really ought to do something..."

This conversation quickly went from light-hearted to sobering in a moment. I felt so emotionally connected to this couple from that point on and saw how my story, although sparking a painful memory, caused the wheels to REALLY start turning. When the left, they both had made mention about how they can't keep putting this off, they've got to start making changes for their health. From that point on I personally held back tears thinking about their loss, but deeper down inside of me I found myself PRAISING and THANKING God for empowering me to do this and do this NOW. Their precious daughter, 33 years YOUNG...that could have easily been my story. At the weight I am now 220 lbs, that STILL could be my story, but at least I know I'm actively taking strides to CHANGE that.

I remember a few years ago a good friend church had called me with a burden. She had been praying while jogging on her treadmill and said God had placed me heavily upon her heart. She said she felt like God was showing her that there was something wrong with my heart and I NEEDED to do something for my health. For about 1 month we worked together on it but it quickly became a faint memory of the past. When I started this journey February of last year, I remember that playing over and over in my head, "There's something wrong with your heart."

I have never discredited that burden and I've settled it in my heart that it's fitting to thank HIM for what was likely a warning. I don't know any differently, but I have to believe that by the state of my health that I was surely not in a good place. I feel like that warning from God was not JUST speaking of the physical state of my HEART though, He was shining light on the depths of my heart as well. There has been something WRONG with my heart - the difference is that latter each one of us has. TEMPTATION, ULTERIOR MOTIVES, BITTERNESS, UN-FORGIVENESS, LOW SELF-ESTEEM...SIN.

THE GOOD NEWS: Just like OBESITY, YOU can make a decision to overcome them and not let them rob Y-O-U of living with fullness of LIFE!

Today I'm PRAISING & THANKING my Heavenly Father for blessing me with life. I'm humbled by His provision and how He speaks to us through others for not only our well-being, but for His namesake. For walking WITH me through 122 pounds of weight loss. For daily showing me His GRACE & MERCY and offering me FORGIVENESS through His son, JESUS CHRIST!

Verse of the Day:

Jeremiah 17:9-10

"The HEART is deceitful above all things, and it is exceedingly perverse and corrupt and severely, mortally sick! Who can know it [perceive, understand, be acquainted with his own heart and mind]? I the LORD search the mind, I try the HEART, even to give to every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his doings."

ONE YEAR of success...

@ the beginning of 2009 I DAILY experienced the following:

· Had excruciating heel spurs
· Severe acid reflux and indigestion
· Lower AND upper back pain
· Knee/joint pain
· Restless sleep
· Daytime wheezing
· Shortness of breathe
· Inability to stand for extended periods of time w/o pain
· Abnormal fears of death at night (from weight related risks: heart attack; stroke; suffocation from excess weight around neck as I laid down; sleep apnea; aneurysm - I always feared no one would find me and paramedics would have excess struggle to revive me due to weight)

ONE YEAR ago I was 342.2 lbs and realized I was OBESE, UNHEALTHY and NEEDED to change.
ONE YEAR ago I decided that I was done “pretending” that my weight didn’t bother me.
ONE YEAR ago I got off the couch and made the first step that is leading to a body that is WHOLE.

While attempting to NOT get overly emotional, I’d like to celebrate ONE YEAR of success today!

At the end of January 2009 I watched my first episode of NBC’s “The Biggest Loser” and reality hit me. I weighed MORE than most female contestants to date on this EXTREME weight loss reality TV show and my situation was a lot worse than I ever allowed myself to believe. I held back tears as I sat inspired by the determination of Kristin Steede whose starting weight I was only 20 lbs less than at the time. That day I recognized that I couldn't push this “under the rug” and act unaffected by it anymore, excuses were running dry and every day lost I was robbing myself of LIFE.

In February, I began my journey with Weight Watchers and lost my first 25 lbs before growing my own wings. I am thankful for Weight Watchers because their program gave me the confidence that I could do this. It helped me prove to myself that I was capable of losing weight on my own.

Since making that first step I have successfully shed 122.2 lbs off of my body leaning on God's strength, and I hope to never see those pounds again. This has proved to be one of the most exciting journeys I’ve ever travelled with everything that goes along with it. Although weight loss can at times be emotional, stressful, confusing and HARD, it’s most certainly worth every part of the trip. I always tell people that the eating right and exercise are the “EASY” parts when it comes to losing weight, it’s the mental and emotional struggles that are the greater battle.

On April 17th I wrote my first blog with the hesitant declaration that “This isn’t the end, it’s just the beginning.” I set out for this blog to be a means of encouragement while documenting my journey. I've tried to share in my posts with you what GOD has done in me over this past year and how it's all been so parallel to my life as a Christian - the two truly have gone hand-in-hand.

In May, I completed my annual 2 mile benefit walk for Advice & Aid Pregnancy Centers and for the first time did not finish LAST, actually I finished towards the front of the walkers.

In June, I completed my FIRST cancer “Relay for Life” benefit walk with my mom and walked 1 ½ hours before injuring myself. June 22nd I completed my first weight loss competition with one of my best friends, Audrey Katzer, and won 2nd place with 46.2 lbs and 23.5 inches lost in 12 weeks.

JULY!!! JULY was a very influential month for me, JULY is when I’d say the switch flipped and I fully realized that God was doing an incredible work in me and I had a powerful TESTIMONY in the making that was changing lives! Early July I had the honor of being featured on Kristin Steede’s blog for her fun “Sweat T-Shirt” competition which was the beginning of some amazing connections with others personally fighting obesity. JULY I met a group of young ladies, each with 100+ pounds to lose, who shared similar goals and stories and we formed a support group FKA “The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Pants.” Although the group disbanded as “The Sisterhood” only 3 months later, those 3 months accelerated my weight loss into overdrive. The love, support, encouragement and FRIENDSHIPS that were formed from that spontaneous and incredibly random adventure are something I will NEVER forget. In July I also celebrated my 24th birthday and FIRST birthday that included ALL healthy selections with my best friends.

In August, I hosted a 100 mile challenge amongst family, friends and co-workers and successfully completed OVER 100 miles of cardio exercise in one month. This month meant so much to me because I had both my Mom & Dad right beside me going on ridiculously long walks almost DAILY as we all fought to reach that goal. I also completed the 9 week weight loss competition that I hosted at my job, finishing in 1st place with 40.6 lbs lost in 9 weeks. As a whole, our group lost 147.5 lbs which brought tears to my eyes seeing how “ME,” “ONE PERSON,” a little encouragement and the phrase “BE MOTIVATED AND MOTIVATE ONE ANOTHER” could spark such a change in lives. I blubbered like a baby after winning over $500 and then being awarded a gift card (organized by participants) in addition to my competition winnings for hosting and inspiring them. WOW!

September 27th I proudly reached my 100 pounds lost milestone and documented with a post titled: “Giant Slain! 100 Pounds!!!”

In October, I ventured on one of the most RANDOM trips of my life to meet 5 total strangers for the Sisterhood Retreat in Wisconsin Dells. It was a girl’s weekend I’ll never forget and although there were both good and bad from that trip, the good is what I hold in my heart dearly. I also had the privilege of meeting my initial inspiration, Kristin Steede, and her Mom (Team Purple Teammate), Cathy Skell. These are two of the most down-to-earth, understanding, HILARIOUS woman to talk to. After hours of conversation at Chili's, we parted ways but have distantly kept in touch. Having the opportunity to meet someone who inspires/inspired you in life is unforgettable. October was also the first month that I made split photos and encouraged facebook followers to create their own to. What a amazing day that proved to be looking back and reflecting on everyone’s emotional journeys.

In November, I ventured to INDIANA and CHICAGO for the first time ever and got to support a friend on her journey as an act of love PROVING that she is worth it and CAN do this! That trip initiated me getting on an airplane for the first time since I was a child and although I never experienced flying at a heavier weight, I was PROUD to fit in the seat when I've heard horror stories from overweight flyers with airplane seating. In November I also had the honor of sharing my weight loss testimony (when put on the spot...lol) at church over Thanksgiving weekend.

The holidays, well, they got the best of me and I “re-found 12+ pounds” on an emotional eating spree while living through the misfortunes of a dear friend…

In December/January, I was featured in an article titled "Halfway There" with KC Fit Magazine. It was a neat experience having this type of feature with a full centerfold article. Also, one of my weight loss sisters and best friends, Ali Trier, and my godson moved in with me and are working on starting a life in Kansas. We completed a ONE MONTH bootcamp at Golds Gym and BOTH took off all the holiday weight we had gained!!! PRAISE GOD!

NOW for the most exciting news, a dream I’ve had since that switched flipped in JULY…to pay it forward and pour into other people’s lives the way I feel I’ve had the rare blessing of receiving in weight loss. Last week F.I.T. “Finding Inspiration Together,” a private group (and fanpage – come follow us) on facebook was birthed by 4 incredible ladies and myself who all share a vision to ENCOURAGE & MOTIVATE other people as they strive to MAKE.IT.HAPPEN in their own lives and conquer discouraging statistics by losing extreme amounts of weight without surgeries or hypnosis. Without “miracle pills” or “fad diets.” Woman who have decided they want to lose weight and reGAIN their lives back! Together we are finding the inspiration to go the distance and it’s brought MANY tears of joy seeing these incredibly STRONG women interact.

I can PROUDLY state that in my ONE YEAR on this common journey of weight loss, overall it’s been a SUCCESS!

THIS is a year in the making of a BODY that is WHOLE:

Body, Mind & Spirit!

Thank you for all of your love and support, I hope to make each of you PROUD in 2010.

(ps. ALL of those painful DAILY experiences listed at the top of this post…GONE!)

Verse of the Day:

Psalm 118:24

"This is the day that the LORD has made; Let us rejoice and be glad in it!"

Final Stretch...

Yep! I'm on the "Final Stretch," of my YEAR! In SEVEN days I will celebrate 1 year since I woke up and made the decision to change my life. Sitting on the couch of a friend, holding back tears as I watched my first full episode of NBC's "The Biggest Loser," and connected immediately with the inspiring weight loss story of Season 7's Kristin Steede.

From that point on, by the STRENGTH I've found in GOD and support I've gained through friends and family I've been able to continue pushing forward on this LONG, HARD journey that many find themseleves on with discouraging statistics that haunt them. You always hear about people LOSING just to turn around and GAIN all over again - seems like the cycle continues on for a lifetime in many instances.

I'm not going to boastfully fall captive to "pride" and say that I'm above that statistic, if it was that easy to beat more people would lose the weight and KEEP it off. Gaining 12 lbs over the holidays was humbling to say the least and helped me to recognize just how "easy" it is to relapse. However, I will BOLDLY say that I'm using those negative statistics as my motivator as I set out to PROVE those statistics wrong.

I hope to make my family, my friends, YOU...MYSELF proud as I do it!

With all those mentioned above though, I cannot forget that the #1 reason I set out to do this is to turn this TEMPLE, created by God, into one that is more pleasing to HIM. God loves us whether a size 30 (start size) or a size 2, but I want to honor HIM with my life as I take care of the body He's given me. I can't take it with me, but while I'm here I need one that is able to live, breathe and MOVE for Him!

STAY TUNED FOR 1 YEAR OF SUCCESS COMING SOON!!!

Verse of the Day:

Proverbs 16:17-18 (Amplified Bible)

"The highway of the upright turns aside from evil; he who guards his way preserves his life.
Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall."

A body that is WHOLE...

It's time for another good challenge!

As of January 6th, I began hosting my SECOND 9 week "Biggest Loser" competition at work with 18 motivated contestants for 2010.

With the #1 Resolution being to LOSE WEIGHT/GET MORE ACTIVE and a close competitor being FINANCES…I thought:

"What better way to kick off 2010 than the HCB “Biggest Loser” Competition with a chance to win some cash!"

Not to mention…our competition ends JUST in time for those healthier bodies to be ready for SPRING!!!

If any of you know me, I LOVE this stuff! I'm competitive - YES - but more than that I love the opportunity to encourage others on this journey the way I've been blessed with encouragment from all of Y-O-U!!! It's rewarding when you watch people change their lives and pursue better health. In one week the small changes are already occuring, some feedback received:

• One co-worker went from snacking on Girl Scout cookies to Kashi Go Lean Triple Berry Crunch at work.


• One cut out her DAILY morning stop to Burker King and is now drinking Protein Shakes or eating Special K cereal bars for her breakfast.


• SEVERAL cut out pop and sugary beverages and saw the payoff on the scale for our first weigh-in.

38.5 lbs was lost between all the contestants this week and I managed to lose 6 pounds for week one! We are off to a great start and I'm excited to see what happens over the next 8 weeks.

This year I really want to focus on being WHOLE! I hope to blog more about what God is doing in my life not just physically, but spiritually, emotionally, mentally and even socially. I can excel for awhile in BODY or in MIND or in SPIRIT but in order to truly be WHOLE...ALL of me should come in order with CHRIST being my center. This year I am out to gain ALL of my life back...my body, my mind AND a right spirit inside me that has been purified, tested and tried by the Holy Spirit!

ARE YOU READY...here's to 2010!!!

Verse of the Day:

John 10:10 (NKJV)

"The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly."

MISSION HOLIDAY(s): Failed

~2010~

HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!

NEW YEAR...NEW ADVENTURES...NEW RESOLUTION...not!

It is a new year and I'm looking forward to the new adventures, however, I'm not one to make resolutions. Just as many resolutions that are "made" are "broken"...why make them at all. Setting out to be a better ME shouldn't be something that just comes around with the start of a new year, that decision can and SHOULD be made every day.

There has been SOOOO much going on since I last wrote and let's just say MISSION HOLIDAY(s): FAILED

I started my weight loss journey the first week of February 2009 and I'm nearly approaching my one year anniversary of weight loss. This was my FIRST time going through holiday's while attempting to lose weight. I never set-out to really lose before because I didn't have the drive or faith in myself that it was possible. I PRE-planned for these holidays but with all the snow and getting stuck in the house...A LOT...I quickly saw how food accompanied my boredom. I've always said, "I'd rather be busy than bored..." Well, I was busy eating to overshadow the boredom.

Add to the obvious boredom of snow days, my best friend is going through an INCREDIBLY rough time right now and I'm so thankful that I've had the opportunity to be there for her...for obvious reasons that causes stress though because you never want to see someone you love in so much pain and hurting!

Throughout all of this, I've gained nearly 15 lbs and am still past my 100 lbs down mark, but not if I keep at this pace.

GOOD NEWS: I'm hosting ROUND II of The Biggest Loser challenge at my job lasting 9 weeks with 18 participants. 9 brand new contestants and 9 returning!

In addition, I was featured in the Dec/Jan issue of KC Fit Magazine. It was an article titled "half-way there" including answers to a set of interview questions. It was a neat experience and now I HAVE to meet up to the expectations and prove what I set out to do in the beginning...beat the statistics and SUCCEED at losing ALL of the weight and keeping it off!

So, here's to a new year folks! MAKE.IT.HAPPEN....let's change our lives one day at a time and not "JUST" because it's a New Year!

Verse(s) of the day:
Deuteronomy 23:23

"Whatever your lips utter you must be sure to do, because you made your vow freely to the LORD your God with your own mouth."

Ecclesiastes 5:4-6 (NIV)

"When you make a vow to God, do not delay in fulfilling it. He has no pleasure in fools; fulfill your vow. It is better not to vow than to make a vow and not fulfill it. Do not let your mouth lead you into sin..."

Was it worth it?

So, how'd everyone do for Thanksgiving? Was the turkey made just right with all the fixin's?

I am PROUD to say I survived my FIRST Thanksgiving while pursuing my Healthy LIFESTYLE change. One of my BEST friends RANDOMLY came to surprise me from Indiana and spent the weekend with me. I love it because she's someone who I met through facebook back in July who has lost almost the EXACT weight as I have and we literally weigh within 1-2 pounds of each other. She LOVES Jesus and through this journey we've become BEST friends! Over the weekend we got to share Thanksgiving, Black Friday madness, Plaza lights, game night with friends, KC BBQ, house/dog sitting, CHURCH, lunch fellowship...we made it ALLLLL the way until Sunday and she had dropped 4 pounds and I maintained.

...and THEN...this happened! YEP! That's none other than a LIKE IT size cup of "Cookie Doughn't Ya Want Some" ice-cream from COLD STONE CREAMERY! Besides...what's a better way to end a weekend with a friend than a little ice cream...WOW! Um yea, by Tuesday I had gained! (add Cracker Barrel and Chick-fil-a to that equation and you paint a BETTER picture as to why).

Now the question I keep hearing whenever I splurge or make a poor choice is:

WAS.IT.WORTH.IT?

You've probably heard people ask the SAME question. I was talking to a friend the other day and I stopped them when I was asked that question. For the first time I REALLLY thought it out!

NO! It's NOT worth it! Why do we ask ourselves this question? We are asking, "Was that FAT LADDEN, CALORIE PACKED, JUNK FOOD ITEM worth your health?" You may label that statement as extreme...but seriously, how do we juggle what IS or isn't worth it? By taste? Food that TASTES good is what got me in this situation to begin with...was being 342 pounds at the age of 23 truthfully WORTH it? How do we deteremine WHEN that fried chicken is NOT worth it...when our bodies have finally shut down and we begin racking up the doctor's bills to prove it?

Here's the deal - I will PREACH moderation on this journey til I am blue in the face...do NOT mistake what I'm saying as you can NEVER eat a french fry or slice of pizza again! All I'm saying is why do we ask ourselves these questions that when you think them out...really are quite foolish? I don't want questions like that to become our greatest deception. How many times in a WEEK can I ask myself: "Was it worth it?" just to JUSTIFY my poor food choice? How often in a DAY can I ask myself this question for it to be acceptable?

I just want us to stop telling ourselves that what TASTES good is MORE worth it than what properly nourishes our bodies. That's all...

Verse(s) of the Day:

Genesis 3:1, 3:13

3:1 Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, "Did God really say, 'You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?"

3:13 Then the LORD God said to the woman, "What is this you have done?" The woman said, "The serpent deceived me, and I ate."

"To eat or NOT to eat..."

I'M BACK...don't think I was giving up on you or anything!!!

I just happened to get SICK! (HaaChooo!!!)

So last time we "talked" I was confessing an emotional GAIN and brutally honest and transparent for two reasons:

1. Accountability

2. Support

It wasn't so much for YOU to keep me accountable, although I appreciate it when you do...however, it was for ME to be accountable to myself. Like I said, if I'm truly convinced that this HAS become a lifestyle change and giving up is NOT an option, why not openly "face the facts" and keep on moving. Why be ashamed or embarrassed about my start and current weight when I know it does not define me or discredit who I'm becoming. SOOOO...Thank You all for your comments and again supporting me on this LONG, hard, yet enjoyable journey that is more than worth it because I am worth it!!!

NOW...

Some of you may be wondering, "So what does this all have to do with a 'No Food or Drink' and 'Just Say No' picture?" Wondering how I cheated and/or messed up AGAIN? Why I opened by paraphrasing my last blog?? Am I beating around bushes???

NOPE!

I filled in for a retirement center branch last week which is always a pleasure because the residents have so much to offer in conversation. Well, the head chef stopped by the bank office while I was working and "generously" dropped of a slice of KEY LIME PIE (while I was ON THE PHONE of all times)!!!

I nearly had a panic attack when I ended my call because I was now faced with a perfectly sliced piece of KEY LIME PIE on a ceramic saucer (this is an important detail) that I KNEW I had not budgeted for NOR should I be eating. I was now faced with the question: "To eat or NOT to eat?" I now faced whether I "politely" accept this kind gesture from "retirement chef" or do I stick to my day because after all, "If you fail to plan, you plan to fail..." and if you PLAN and don't stick to it...well, you still failed.

(It's okay to laugh at that comment...it was supposed to be funny...SMILE a little!!!)

So back to the story!!! The fact that this sweet treat sat on my desk on a CERAMIC SAUCER is a major detail folks! The retirement branch closes at 4pm at which time I lock the doors and am well on my way. This means...RETIREMENT CHEF will likely be back before 4pm to retrieve this dirty dish and inquire about my satisfaction. Lying wasn't an option...but for that days eating itinerary that piece of pie wasn't worth the $$price$$. So many decisions, so little time and it felt as though the WALLS themselves were staring at me waiting for this CHOICE. At that moment I drew what seemed to be a great conclusion: "When RETIREMENT CHEF returns, I'll simply tell him I'm dieting and I really shouldn't be eating that pie but 'Thanks' anyways."

PERFECT!!! (...in a "picture-perfect" world...)

This is when my thought process is interrupted by none other than Mr. RETIREMENT CHEF!!! With a glistening piece of pie still awaiting my appetite I immediately pitch my line. Right when I felt the invisible "pat on the back," he replied with: "GOOD! It's sugar free," and was well on his way before I could react and with this ceramic saucer remaining on my desk.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!! Some may say, "Rock on, that's great!" Oh no, not me...now a bad situation just got WORSE!!! Folks, just because something is SUGAR FREE does NOT constitute CALORIE FREE. Better option...sometimes...but this doesn't void the fact that this TREAT is calories you EAT.

I am PROUD to say that I resisted the temptation and eased away from the wall I felt backed against by discretely disposing of the pie to avoid an offense and simply *SMILING* as I handed him this empty ceramic saucer and proceeded to appear too "busy" to engage in conversation. (Okay, maybe a little deceptive...but it worked alright!!!)

MISSION COMPLETE: "It's all about choices..."

Verse of the Day: Titus 2:11-13

For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to say "No" to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope—the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ,