The journey...

Life is in the journey, not the destination, so do what you can and take it one day at a time. Go slow, do it right, and make your changes permanent — then help out others who are where you were.

~Jillian Michaels

Created by MyFitnessPal - Free Calorie Counter

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Are you game?


You may be saying, "Huh, 100 mile challenge? What does that mean?" I'm challenging however many people want to join me to 100 miles of cardio exercise in the month of August. This averages about 3.23 miles per day. Your cardio can be a combination of walking, running, jogging, biking or elliptical.

ONLY RULE: If you commit to the 100 mile challenge, I want you to FULLY commit. Let's hold each other accountable to getting up and active to end this summer right! By August 31st, I don't want any of us to have ANY regrets!


If you are participating, let me know and I will give you instructions on adding the "official" 100 Mile Challenge button to your profile. Feel free to write a blog post inviting your friends to join the challenge too.

Verse of the Day

Colossians 3:23
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord...

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Finish the story...

The following post was inspired by Kristin Steede's blog (from Season 7 of The Biggest Loser)!

***This is the point where you take over! Finish the story. Write it down here. If you were riding on your wagon but hit a bumpy road and fell off tell me how your story ends. YOU are the ONLY one who can write your story. (There is a deep message in that sentence) You are the only one who can decide how much time you spend on the side of a bumpy road while all of these other wagons pass you by.

(Springboard taken from Kristin Steede's blog <- click the link to read it all, made me cry!)

My response:

I fall off and immediately old friends begin to flock around. In the midst of the commotion, other wagons continuously pass me by - some unstable, some seemingly unhindered by the unlevel path and others knocking passengers off as well. In the crowd of those now standing around me, I recognize ones that had been travelling too, ones who were supposed to be on this journey with me, ones who SHOULD have taken this journey with me and even those who warned me in advance of the trials I would face and discouraged me from even starting. "Where am I? I thought I left them all in the dust - how did I get back to this place of not moving and covered in dirt? This is no place for me to be. I didn't anticipate this along the way." Then it hits me! The difference between them and me! I look at the faces of all of these people, the smiles, the laughing & joking - but not much has changed. It seems like they are just doing the same routines simultaneously on repeat. I begin reading their shirts, "FAILURE," "DEFEAT," "WORTHLESS..." No one particularly "stand outs" from the crowd. Then I glimpse down to see that there are chains on their feet. I gasp while saying, "They've become comfortable and this is no place for me!" I notice that although I'm here in this moment, there is no chain holding me down - YET! I then read my shirt, "PROUD!" Immediately I realize the difference between them and me is they've tried and failed, attempted but were defeated, tripped up and felt worthless and QUIT! Not me though, I may have fallen but I still have SO MUCH to be proud of. I'm doing something different than all of those who have just settled in their state of being. Then I realized, I AM WORTH every bit of this journey - through the good and bad! Settling isn't an option! I wasn't promised it would be easy - BUT I'M NOT GIVING UP! I brush off my now torn pant knees and shake it off a bit from the impact of the fall. I'm now standing at the fork in the road. One sign reads, "Easy - newly paved roads with smooth path. Destination: COMFORT" The other reads "Hard - unfinished road, beware of potholes, storms and visibility. Destination: FREEDOM" After moments of deep thought, the answer becomes apparent..."I'm choosing the road that will DAILY make me proud!" I haven't reached the end yet...but I am already being FREED!

What have YOU done today, to make yourself proud?

Thanks Kristin!

Quote of the day:

"Two roads diverged in a wood
And I took the one less traveled by
And that has made all the difference."

~M. Scott Peck

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Confessions of a Shopaholic...


Hey guys, it's been WAY too long since I last blogged - life has been EXTREMELY busy! There are so many things I've wanted to blog about because I seriously think in "blog" now - however, if I don't get it written down in that small's gone folks! hahaha
To bring everyone back up to speed, Saturday I hit my 75 lb milestone and won two side bets (mom and BFF). Monday I turned 24 (kinda scary if you ask me). Tuesday, I WENT SHOPPING!

Okay, so my title isn't exactly "fitting" (<-remember that word), since I haven't been shopping in literally MONTHS, but I just thought it was catchy. :) Since I began this weight loss journey, I have refused to go shopping - main reason was out of delusional fear. The nightmare of picking out clothes only to find I'm still in the same size kept me FAR from any clothing store.

Finally, it was time. After nearly 6 months of dropping weight I made a professional based decision that I MUST purchase some new work clothes to avoid looking like a clown every day. (I'm a Senior Relationship Banker). As skewed as my vision of "ME" had been - as much as my clothes sagged - as many positive words of encouragement I had received...I was convinced it surely wasn't true!

Well right when I walk into this clothing store that I used to frequent, the manager stops from across the store and says, "IS THAT YOU!?!" and approaches me. She then proceeds to circle around me with her mouth wide open. Slightly confused and not connecting the dots I said, "Um, yea!"


"I've lost 75 lbs since you last saw me."
She was so intrigued and I got to share all about the encourager's in my life, what I'm doing to make this happen, my goals, etc. Someone could have walked in and robbed the store unnoticed while she stood questioning and amazed by my story (in the making). It was definitely the positive reinforcement that I needed this week - but it didn't stop there!

MANAGER: "So, what size do you wear?"

MESHA: "Well, I don't really know. I've been to afraid to come try new clothes on."

MANAGER: " about you try this size. I'll give you two sizes in case one doesn't fit."

(Mesha dreadfully trying on clothes)

MESHA: "WHAT??? Umm....can I get a SMALLER size please?"

You girls catch that? For the first time in probably my LIFE - I actually had to try a smaller PANTS size. I can't tell you how PROUD that made me feel. Yep, I said it - I was able to feel PROUD! It's a lot easier for me to be proud of my friends and the girls I try to encourage on this journey too - It's hard for me to see it in myself though. Tuesday...tuesday was one of those days joy just welled up in my heart and the overflow came out in the form of an uncontrollable smile upon my face. I was able to finally take a moment and be PROUD of what I'm doing and the progress I've made.


For the first time since I started this weight loss journey, I was actually encouraged in a way that made me feel good about myself PHYSICALLY. I've had the encouragement emotionally from my wonderful friends and family, but to feel good about what's happening to my body almost brought me to tears.


Here lately I've felt to explain WHY I am using the verses I have chosen for my blog posts and today I wanted to elaborate a bit again, if you will allow. ((hugs)) This verse is about Solomon rebuilding the temple - the house of the living God. David (Solomon's dad) basically tells him to be strong and do the work it takes to finish the job. Don't be discouraged, don't give in to fears, you are not weak...GOD IS WITH YOU! He will stay by your side until the work is finished and this temple is complete. PERFECT! In the New Testament, God calls our bodies the "Temple of the Holy Spirit." (1 Cor 6:19) His spirit isn't "contained" by four walls - he chose to call our hearts HIS home and this body His temple. It NEEDS to be in order for a Holy God to come and dwell within us. I'm believing that as I'm "doing the work" and rebuilding the temple known as my body, that God will not fail me, or forsake me. That he will absolutely be by my side until the work is complete...not just half finished. The verse goes on to say, "and every willing man skilled in any craft will help you in all the work." BEAUTIFUL!

God has given me an amazing friend and instructor who uses her skills to invest into helping me succeed. I have a best friend who knows me better than anyone else and just what it takes to motivate me and keep me moving. I have a group of ladies (my sisterhood) who have poured out all they know from their own journeys they are travelling and tremendously encouraged me as they too walk this out along side me. I have family, church family, friends, co-workers, CUSTOMERS, gym employees, blog followers and facebook pals who have become that "willing man" to help me in all my work. It's truly humbling. It's truly encouraging. It's truly a blessing. It truly amazes me.

(tears in my eyes)

Verse of the Day:
..., "Be strong and courageous, and do the work. Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD God, my God, is with you. He will not fail you or forsake you until all the work for the service of the temple of the LORD is finished."

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

24 year ago...

Thanks for all the birthday love, messages, calls and gifts...

JULY 20, 1985

24 years ago God blessed me with life...NOW, I want to bless HIM with my life!

Favorite childhood photo - in red sweatsuit (click photo to enlarge)

"Baby Mesha"

Me @ age 5 on left




My good friend Richie (see below)

Not only did he text me at 12:01 am to wish me happy he text me later in the day too with a message that I thought was really encouraging and thoughtful. He said:

"Just think, you're 75 pounds younger" and one year older...

I literally said, "Ahhhh...." out loud at my desk because as simple as the statement was, it was really meaningful to me. He showed up at my job that afternoon with a $25 gift card to Price Chopper and said:

"I know eating healthy can be kinda expensive, so thought this might help you out."

Rich & I @ my job
I know I've talked about it before, but "bad company corrupts good habits." (1 Cor 15:33) It is so important, especially with weight loss, to be surrounded by a group of people who will encourage you and help you along the way. You can't be around those who are constantly pulling you down and tempting you in unhealthy ways. I am so thankful for my family, friends, co-workers, sisterhood sisters, blogger buddies, etc.
My manager brings in the cake of choice for EVERY birthday here at our branch. I prepared myself in advance and gave her fair warning 2 weeks ago that I DO NOT want cake for my birthday and "Thanks anyways." Without hesitation she said, "I understand. Can I get you a fruit tray or veggie tray instead. I'd still like to celebrate your birthday with everyone." How cool is that? So FRUIT IT IS!!! :)
(REMEMBER: "Everything in moderation...")
Although I didn't opt for the "healthiest" selections, I immediately separated half of my 6 oz steak, half of my LOADED mashed potatoes and a lovely dinner roll. Those are in the fridge right now waiting to be consumed in proper proportion. :)

DIET COKE W/ LIME (Compliments of Shauna)

I'm going to do their commercials ( my car I do them @ least)

Some times it's just the simplistic gifts in life that really make you smile!!!


Verse of the Day:

Jeremiah 1:5 (NIV)
"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart;

Ecclesiastes 7:20 (NIV) - "Birth Verse" - I don't usually get into stuff like this, but an email once listed the following verse as my "Birth Verse," and I just love the scripture so I have since kept it handy. Just a reminder to me that NO ONE is perfect and we fall short. But yet God's word still calls us "Righteous."

"There is not a righteous man on earth who does what is right and never sins."

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Weekend adventures...

There is WAY too much to blog about this weekend so I'll try to be brief:

♥ AS OF SATURDAY MORNING, IT'S OFFICIAL...I'VE LOST 75 LBS SINCE FEBRUARY!!! I'm now $150 richer (compliments of BFF Audrey and my mom)

♥ Friday my friends had a game night party for an early birthday event and it was a blast. We played Phase 10 and Apples to Apples. I was really thankful for them that night though because I realized that I have some of the best friends who are encouragers and not enablers. To rally around my weight loss journey, they all brought a healthy dish to eat even though they aren't all dieting themselves. I LOVE THE FRIENDS GOD'S BLESSED ME WITH!!! (now, I must say, the guys are definately encouraging as's a little harder for them to give up their food...

♥ Saturday I did 25 minutes on the stair master. I went to one of my BFF's wedding shower, Ashley. In the evening my family had a game/Wii party with Ground Turkey taco salads and it was a lot of fun. That night my friend Ty and I went on a 2 1/2 mile walk at the park...

♥ Sunday morning church. After church a group of the girls went out to First Watch - i heart first watch. I had a egg white omelette w/ turkey.

♥ The sisterhood. Late this week a group of ladies I met through Kristin Steede's blog formed sisterhood as we've literally developed some very deep relationships in the matter of a few weeks. I feel closer to these ladies than some people I've known my whole lives. I LOVE MY SISTERS and I'm thankful beyond words for the sisterhood. These ladies have been "tattooed" on my heart. My last blog actually talked about the challenge I proposed for one of these ladies (and a second sister took it up) and after 5 days of following my challenge, SHE LOST 7 LBS....7 LBS IN 5 DAYS!!!

♥ I had the "opportunity" if that's what you'd call it to write out some really, really personal deep things this weekend and share them in confidence to not only my sisters, but also a wonderful friend that I cherish. Sometimes as much as you hate it, you've got to look at some things, acknowledge them and keep going from there. There is a scripture that says, "Confess your sins one to another so that you may be HEALED!" (James 5:16) I'm just standing on God's word and believing for that emotional and mental healing...and I'm thankful that my story wasn't received with a judgmental heart!

"Don't let your past dictate what your future will be..."

After getting my hair done. :)
Healthy food compliments of my lovely friends!
Fat-free cream cheese, cucumber, fresh dill and seasonings on a small piece of bread.

My "Birthday Cake." Fresh berries, angel food cake, greek yogurt & fat free cool whip

Veggie plate w/ low fat ranch dip

Fruit Kabobs

Ashley preparing some food.
My friend Audrey loves me...she brough Diet Coke w/ Lime.
...NOW, not everyone wanted to eat healthy...
Kim had a slice of pizza that the boys bought for themselves.
Matt & Stephen were definately all about the pizza too.
I have to give it up for Steven though - he's lost 15lbs now in 3 weeks!
Ashley and I with our poker...or eh...PHASE 10 faces on! :)
The wedding shower was at the most georgeous house i have EVER seen. Oh my!
They have a stinkin' sauna in their house. An inground pool, hot tub, 3 fireplaces, more bathrooms than I can count and 5 bedrooms each the size of a masterbed. WOW!
The chandeliers made me think of Shauna! The faux paint in a few rooms made me think of my friend Jennifer which made me smile.
The "soon to be" bride and groom following wedding shower.
Aren't they so stinkin' cute. He just got back from 10 months in China (almost their entire
"Lunch" after church today @ first watch.
Egg white omelette w/ salsa, English Muffin & fresh tomatoes.
Our sisterhood photo for our private facebook group - I love these ladies and am so thankful to know them and be encouraged by them.

Verse of the Day:

Hebrews 10:24 (NIV)
And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.

Friday, July 17, 2009

eClub sabotage



"What's this a picture of?"
you may ask...well let me tell ya.

Do any of you know what an "eClub" is? Basically it's when you sign up online for a businesses promotions and updates and they will send periodic emails containing coupons, specials, new things and such.

WELL...Monday is my 24th birthday and this week my email inbox has been bombarded by "birthday presents." lol

SONIC - FREE Medium drink, tots or blast
PAPA JOHNS - FREE Medium pizza
PAPA MURPHY'S - BOGO (Buy One Large, Get One Free)
GOLDEN CORRAL - $5 coupon
RYAN'S - BOGO (Buy One Buffet, Get One Free)

The only coupon I've actually used (as of yet) was the Sonic coupon this morning for a Diet Coke w/ Lime (I paid $0.22 to upgrade to a Route 44)

I will use the First Watch coupon as well - that is my all time favorite breakfast place and they have a great selection of healthy/healthier choices. I heart First Watch.

Now, I need to stay strong of this morning I am 0.4lbs away from hitting my 75lbs lost mark and I need to hit that by Monday (to win $150) - still far from final goal, but it's definately a milestone I'm looking forward to. :) Here's the dilemma...


Friday - Game night w/ group of friends @ BFF's house - everyone is "SUPPOSED" to bring healthy snacks ONLY.

Saturday - morning (still slight possibility of Biggest Loser tryouts @ Nebraska Furniture Mart)

afternoon - My other BFF's wedding shower

evening - family birthday get together @ parents house - taco salads w/ ground turkey and some Wii action.

Sunday - Lunch after church with some more friends

Monday - Dinner (and maybe movie) after work w/ BFF, her husband & roommates


ABOUT THE VERSE BELOW: I seriously pick the verses I use each day for a reason, because I love the word and think these verses are relevant to my blog entry. God's word IS relevant. Although there is SO MUCH more to be learned from the scriptures I choose - I use them as a parallel for this weight loss journey. This verse is talking about how we are "free" - but we shouldn't use our freedom as an excuse to indulge in anything. Our minds are really being changed, renewed and transformed as we continue on this weight loss journey to "freedom." We aren't bound to diets and workouts - we really are FREE, we can enjoy our favorite dish or miss a workout if we choose...but that doesn't mean we INDULGE. In another verse (1 Cor 10:23) Paul quotes the people by saying "everything is permissable" but then responds to that phrase with, "but not everything is beneficial." One thing that bugs me is when people who are at a healthy weight (espeically men) say "but I can eat whatever I want, I don't need to lose weight." My response: "But is it beneficial." Just because you CAN do something and you are free to do it, doesn't mean it's beneficial. I posted several translations because each one says it in a slightly different way, meaning the same thing - yet each kinda hit me with a different light. I don't use The Message translation often but I just love the way it puts it!

Read and be encouraged & challenged...

Verse of the Day:

Galatians 5:13 (NIV)
"You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature"

(NKJV) For you, brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use liberty as an opportunity for the flesh

(KJV) For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh

(The Message) It is absolutely clear that God has called you to a free life. Just make sure that you don't use this freedom as an excuse to do whatever you want to do and destroy your freedom

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Do you have a vision?

I'm down 70lbs - I need to hit 75lbs lost by Monday, which happens to be my 24th birthday. :)

Read and weep friends! Well, I don't want you to cry, "Read and REJOICE" I suppose."
Yep - that's 35 hard core minutes on the Stair Master w/ 353.3 calories burnt

This would be me drenched in sweat wondering what in the WORLD is wrong with me...

Me trying not to faint! I seriously was light-headed and thought I could pass out any minute. :(
Me thinking, "Girl, ARE YOU CRAZY! - 35 minutes, seriously, ARE YOU CRAZY!"

WiiFit - went to my folks house to log my weight with the Wii and "Mr. Balance Board," had this encouraging comment for me. It was a great way to end my work out day!

Breakdown of thought process:

5:45a - SNOOZE!
6:10a - Thyroid Medicine - SNOOZE
6:30a - Roll over...SNOOZE
6:45a - wake up - brush teeth, desperately search for clean gym clothes
7:00a - "Oh snap...I need to get to the gym."
7:15a - "Well shucks, it's too late for the stair master." (head to water aerobics)
7:30a - short, VERY SHORT, walk around Community Center
8:00a - 50 min water aerobics class with my beautiful instructor and friend, Shauna


7:10p - "Ah snap! I soooo wish I would have went to the gym this morning."
7:30p - wasting time - avoiding task @ hand
7:40p - *shrugs shoulders* "Oh well, I guess I have to do this...might as well start now."
8:00p - *happy dance* "Uh huh, that's right - hit my 20 minutes"

...a few seconds pass (while still stepping)...

*whisper in enticing voice* "Why not go for 25 Mesha, afterall, you've been challenged. Come on, you are only 5 minutes you really wanna stop now?"

8:05p - *sweat pouring from brow, neck - and well just about everywhere*

"Do you really wanna cop out now, I mean, 5 more minutes and you can say you've done half an hour twice. You know you wanna...just do it."

8:10p - *gasping for breathe*

"MESHA! Seriously, are you settling for just TYING your record? Aren't you more than a you just meet the standard or do you SET the standard...break that record and hit 35 minutes or else you'll regret it the rest of the night."

8:15 - *sigh*

"...nice, but 40 minutes is only..." STOP

"Um, KNOCK KNOCK! That superwoman shirt you are wearing does NOT make you superwoman. You are 10 feet in the air, getting light headed and about to faint - STOP NOW!!!"

"Whew, finally an internal voice with some common sense and logic - PRAISE GOD!!!"


This week I proposed 3 challenges to a new found friend of mine, Valerie, and one was @ least 20 minutes of cardio 5x this week. She braved the "Satan Torture Machine of Death" as she called it and blogged about it to - go give her some mad props friends! Thanx! Ali also took me up on Valerie challenge and is doing it herself and was quite the overachiever with her P90x and other workout videos...check out her post too.

Verse of the Day:
Proverbs 29:18 (NKJV)
18 Where there is no revelation, the people cast off restraint; But happy is he who keeps the law.
ABOUT THE VERSE: I chose this verse today because without a "revelation" that this constant battle we fight DAILY against weight is not some 12-step program, it's not some fad diet - we will fail. It's TRULY a life-style change. Without that revelation, we will "cast of restraint" and dive back into our old ways and end up worse off. The King James Version actually read, "Where there is no vision, the people perish."

I want to be a vessel of honor for God (including this physical body).

I want to live a healthy, enjoyable life.

I want to have a family and be around to raise them. Play with them. Love them.

Do you have a vision?

Monday, July 13, 2009

Don't Waste Your Life Tour

On Thursday I went on a 24 hour vacation/road trip to Oklahoma City for the Don't Waste Your Life Tour featuring Lecrae, Trip Lee, Tedashii, Sho Baraka, Flame and some guest appearances. It was seriously a great trip and so worth the 10 hours spent on the road in a 24 hour window.

So, I doubt anyone who reads my blog actually listens to Christian rap music (other than Audrey & Jacqui), however, these boys are great. With the exception of Flame, they have a group called the 116 Clique and it comes from the following passage:

Romans 1:16 (NIV)
I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile.

They make their music ALL about the gospel, living for Jesus and taking a stand. It's seriously good stuff - the only rap I would listen to, because quite frankly that other stuff JUNK!

Me taking a nap during the LONG ride back home

Chris reading some of Martin Luther's writings.
Chris is a definate encourager and blessed my socks off

Me, Chris & Josh waiting in line (IT WAS CRAZY HOTT!!!)
Chris & Jacqui waiting in line (love this photo)
Sho Baraka - "the mountain in front may seem un-climbable/ but after his work on the cross it would seem irresponsible/ if we threw in the towel because of life's small obstacles/ yeah we know a GOD who makes the unlikely possible/ his phenomenal love and holiness aint optional/ so the world looks at us like were so illogical/ keep our face in the word to be a godly influence/ if you really want to know here's the reason why I do this"
Tedashii - "this a call to discipleship/losing your life/that's the call a disciple gets/daily/following the scriptures of God/getting intimate with intent as you listen to God/Da-Da-Daily"
Lecrae - "Mathew twenty-four and fourteen.We should read it twice before we think that life is just a battle see we free in christ!Look dawg! Life is more than church work and football!What if you were dead and seen that christians overlooked y'all!This is why we leave the couch and leave the comforts of our house to show a die'n world a God they'll probably never read about."
Josh loving the concert

One of the things that stuck out to me the most about these guys and I just loved it, but they stopped the show TWICE because these teens girls were all screaming and reaching out to touch them and stuff and the flat out addressed it by saying, "Look, we are nothing. We are up here to exalt Christ through our music - this isn't about 'us.' Some of you may just be here to be entertained, but I hope you hear the words we write in our songs."

I had to commend them for that because its so true and at the end of the night, they are ordinary Christians walking the walk of faith just like us - nothing to be exalted like people have made our "music icons" of the world out to be these days.

The other cool thing was Lecrae spent like 40 minutes of one on one time with my friend Josh encouraging him to stand strong and praying for him. Promised to be checking in on him and everything. These guys are humble, strong men of God who are warriors. LOVE IT!

Verse of the Day:

Proverbs 16:18 (NKJV)
Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before a fall.



To any of you who read this who are blogging about your weight loss journey/success - stop by Michelle's page @ the Former Fat Girl to be a part of our FitRoll. In a nutshell its a quick linklist to add to your blog that randomly updates with other inspirational bloggers pages to keep you updated. It's also a way to advertise your own page through those participating in the FitRoll.

**See my FitRoll to the left of my page as an example of how it works**

The following exerpt was taken from Michelle's page:

BlogRolling is a one-stop linklist manager for your blog or journal. Join other Former Fat Girls on the FitRoll and get some thinspiration in seconds, with a simple code that will update automatically with fresh content when other Former Fat Girls have updated their blogs!

Join the FitRoll today!

Blog listings are sorted randomly, and will have the cute convo heart bubble appear after their name when they've been updated in the last 12 hours. The code is set up to recognize your site's CSS (it should keep the same font style and colors of your blog).

To join the FitRoll and for official rules, contact MICHELLE with your URL and the name you would like your blog listed as. I will contact you with further instructions and information.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Healthy Relationship

I was reading through various blog posts and Alexis (who I met through Kristin Steede's blog) wrote a post called "My Secret Love Affair Part 1." At the end of this very true and easy to relate to post, she asked some questions that were probably more rhetorical than anything, but being the blogger that I am I decided to answer them right here. This "Love Affair" she is referring to is the one so many people have with FOOD.

Alexis's Question:

"Breaking up is never easy, but like in real life relationships, its easier to break up when you have friends by your side supporting you. Ask yourself today, What is your relationship with food? Are you hiding a secret love affair? and are you ready for the break up?"

My Response:

I am SOOOO thankful to be able to say my love affair ended in February. Food and I are now simply colleagues and "food" actually works to HELP me achieve my goal of freedom rather than tempting me into an unhealthy relationship that ultimately left me feeling empty anyways. Not to mention the "baggage" associated with yet another sinful interaction. Fast food and junk food no longer whisper into my ear and allure me to the drive thru @ nearly midnight. Route 44 Cherry Dr. Peppers no longer rock me to sleep and relieve the stress of my day (although Diet Coke's w/ Lime occassionally do now). Second and third plates are a faint memory, there is only one marked for me. :) Not to mention I'm noticing a little extra money in the bank from avoiding these temporary "fixes." It's actually kinda crazy because early into my journey I just couldn't comprehend this "needing to eat to lose" idea and in turn I was eating unhealthily LOW amounts of calories and I plateaued for 4-5 weeks losing only ~3lbs in that time frame. It was HORRIBLE. Now I actually smile about my mid day and mid afternoon snacks of fresh fruit or yogurt knowing that by eating this food it's going to keep my metabolism moving which will help me pull off pounds. I LOVE THE NEW RELATIONSHIP WE HAVE, one of building up and not tearing down.

Tell me a little bit about YOUR relationship with food? Is it a healthy one? A moderate one? Does food own the key to your heart? Should it?

Verse of the Day:

Hosea 2:7 (NKJV)
She will chase her lovers, but not overtake them; Yes, she will seek them, but not find them. Then she will say, ‘ I will go and return to my first husband, for then it was better for me than now.’

Friday, July 10, 2009

Guest in town...

Some of you may remember my good ol' friend "little voice" who came and visited me on the treadmill the first time I ever walked a 5k. Well, little voice bought a ticket back into town and teamed up with motivation and will-power to drive me CRAZY this week. Actually, my sweet friend Shauna and her dear husband Bill assisted in their safe arrival, so I would have someone to keep me company while they were actually on a family vacation. :)

Before I further confuse you, let me elaborate.

The stair master, which I've been respectfully referring to as the "death machine," has been the most difficult cardio for me - yet I keep being drawn to it as I figure the intensity must serve as a sign of a highly effective workout. Well, the first day I experimented with these rotating stairs, I thought I was dying after 2 minutes and was proud to have actually endured 5 minutes. This machine that must have been created by a fitness enthusiast is no respector of persons. I say that for the fact that no matter how slow and sluggish I begin moving, it always presents an ultimatum:



Well, recently I was challenged by Shauna to push myself and go for 10 minutes. Me being the stubborn competitor that I am, called myself "teaching her" (haha - how this torture teaches her, I've yet to figure out, sounds good when I'm working out though) and I pushed myself to exceed her requirement and go 15 minutes. Walking away with a sense of accomplishment, I proudly relayed the picture message via phone that displayed my 15:01 time on this hateful machine. Of course, any good challenger never lets up that easily and she replied with, "Well, why not 20 minutes?" As can be assumed, I painfully accepted the challenge and completed 20 minutes at the gym with my friend Audrey the next day. That's when Bill decides to escort himself into our conversation by playfully asking, "Why can't you do 25 minutes?" Ugh! That's when "little voice" joined in the efforts and talked me through 26 LONG, HARD minutes on the stair stepper, BEFORE one hour of water aerobics might I add.

As much as I wish I would have just completed 4 more minutes to make 30 - I was able to smile at yet another exercise *milestone* and realize that we truly can do the things we set our minds to.


Verse of the Day:

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (NKJV)
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Cardio Blitz

...not to be foolishly confused for Cardio "Bliss." On no folks, there isn't absolutely NOTHING "blissful" about this fast paced, heart pumping, blood sweating "boot-camp" type of class.

OH...and did I mention it's at 5:30 am???

You know there is this scripture where Jesus says, "I did not come to bring peace, but a sword." (Mt. 10:34) Although TOTALLY different references - that's how I'd describe this class. lol. Seriously, nothing pleasant, peaceful and leisurely about it. Not a social, mild, beginner type experience. NOPE. Our instructor just whipped out the sword and quickly proved to me that this is no class for the faint of heart. Straight up hard-core, no nonsense, melt-away the fat, cardio aerobics. :)

To give a bit more "descriptive" summary of the class: The 1st HALF of class basically (don't be deceived by the word 'basic') consists of a 30 min spin session (on a bike similar to that pictured above - notice the seat, or what is considered to be a seat. lol...this isn't some "cushy," sit and relax chair). So after this first HALF of class wrapped up, the instructor went around the class to ask what everyone's objective was for the class.

Endurance. Loss 10 lbs. Endurance. Train for a triathalon...

"And Mesha? Your objective?"

DEATH! At least that what it appears to be. I don't think I was in the right state of mind this morning when I hit my alarm at 5 am, jumped out of bed and proceeded to drive to a 5:30 am DEATH class!

The 2nd HALF of class includes random cardio of the instructors choice followed by an abdominal workout/cool down. Todays was step aerobics, which thanks to the WiiFit I was capable of completing. A little shorter of breathe than usual though.

Now, I'm going to be honest, after the class was finished there was a feeling of liberation that came over me as I proudly displayed my sweat (should have used that as my "sweat" T-shirt contest entry). I've kinda been on cloud 9 knowing I completed it, however, I think I'm going to wait another 50 or so lbs before I attempt to face this feat again. haha

After this morning - I think my love/hate relationship with the stair stepper has turned into one of great appreciation.

Bring it on stepper - bring it on!

Verse of the Day:

Psalm 18:2 (NKJV)
The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; My God, my strength, in whom I will trust; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Rip the band-aid off

So I was over at my new found friend, Valerie's page today and she posted this analogy I've heard before but is so very good.

"If you have ever been to a circus, perhaps you have seen six-ton elephants tethered by rope to little wooden stakes. Have you ever wondered why one of these powerful animals doesn't yank that stake out of the ground and stampede off? When the elephants are young and powerless, they are attached by heavy chains to immovable steel stakes. The baby elephants tug and pull, but no matter how hard they try, the chains will not come out of the ground. As the elephants grow and get stronger, they come to believe that they cannot move anywhere as long as there is a stake in the ground nearby, no matter how tiny or weak the stake. They don't try to break loose because they think they can't. So it is with people. If you are like those circus elephants, you've allowed your thoughts and actions to limit you, and like those elephants, you may not have been aware that you had choices. Well, you may not have been aware before, but I'm telling you now that you do have choices, you do have power, now you know. You don't have to stay mindlessly tied to stakes of wrong thinking and self-destructive behavior. You can pull up the stakes of wrong thinking and self-destructive behavior. You can "pull up the stakes," transcend your conditioning, and reprogram yourself for success rather than failure."
--The Ultimate Weight Solution by Dr. Phil McGraw

This mindset is so parrallel to anything that keeps us bound in life - for the sake of this blog, namely weight loss. After so many failed attempts its easy to start taking mental note of all your failed attempts and the pain associated with failing and each time the fear grows a little bit stronger. You hate failure. You hate defeat. You hate the shame. The guilt. The pain associated with struggling.

So you simply give up...

That's accepting defeat and choosing bondage over freedom. All the while you can be free but you are allowing the past to keep you from succeeding. This isn't just with weight loss folks, this is ANYTHING that has us bound. Seriously - the first time I heart this analogy shared, it was by my pastor during a church prayer meeting. I remember it hit my like stakes through the heart because I related to it SO WELL. I actually responded during the service by saying, "You know - the thing about that analogy is in the physical, there most likely WILL be some pain associated with getting free. Having to glimpse at the past, irritate some old wounds, possible emotion stress of numerous time of failing - HOWEVER - it's made out to be a mountain when it's really a mole hill." The more we dwell on that "stake," that thing we are tied to, the greater the issue seems to be and the harder it appears to receive the freedom. It's seems "easier" to stay tied up, not going anywhere, no joy - yet no extreme pain! Fair trade, right? NOT!

There is SO much more for us in life - sometimes you just have to flat out rip the bandage off a wound for it to be fully healed.

If there is ANYTHING keeping you bound today - anything you are tied down to and feel as though you can't be freed. I promise you, there is freedom, there is hope. The process may be a bit uncomfortable, you may have to revisit some issues you'd rather hide away - but the end result is breaking lose and being FREE!

Verse of the Day:

Galatians 5:1 (NIV)

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

4th of JULY!!!


Even though I pre-planned for the 4th to be my "free day," I didn't have to go to bed guilty because of my food choices which rocks. It was actually more of an active day than anything: volleyball, catch, running like a mad woman from way-ward fireworks and more. The thing I've learned about "free days" is that they aren't "blow it" days, reward yourself with a meal (in moderation) and stay on track the rest of the day. It's not a "free for all" buffet - I've worked too hard to do that to myself! Enjoy some pics from 4th of July...

Melody, Me & Johannah - Red, White & Blue @ Pastors farmMelody! I LOVED THIS SHIRT! It said, "Red, White & New." @ the top it had a scripture about the blood of Christ and @ the bottom it had the "If anyone is in Christ he is a NEW creation" verse.Ashley, Audrey & I - my best friendsMom, Dad & I @ Katzer's house (w/ Jessi in the Amo!!!TAYLOR! FINALLY HOME!

Ashley's fiance, just back from 10 months in China - teaching English & sharing Christ which has to be done "underground" as it's illegal to share Christ there.My beautiful Mom & Beautiful friend & roommate Jacqui Jo
The plate of "good stuff" we should have all been eating. :)

The food we spent all day TRYING to avoid...did pretty well too!

You know there is a problem in volleyball when 4 people are all running towards a central location after ONE ball! :) I LOVE PLAYING VOLLEYBALL!!! Emily about to BUMP the ball. This was after she recovered from me accidentally taking her out earlier in the day! Anyone who knows me, knows I have balance issues and find myself falling on the ground quite often. Oops! :(

Joshie boy & I. He's like the little bro I never had - and we fight like he is too. :) Battle wounds!

NEVER PLAY WITH FIRE! I got sparks in my eye while doing fireworks.

My roommate got hit by a "wayward" firework & it burnt through her shirt and burnt her arm too. *sigh*

It was an all-around fun day once again!

Great friends, great fun, great food and great FREEDOM!


Verse of the Day:

Galatians 5:1 (NIV)

It is for FREEDOM that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.