Getting hotter...

TODAY'S WEIGH-IN: -1.2 lbs
TOTAL LOST: -96.2 pounds since February 2009

Have you ever played that game where you are trying to find something and the person who hid it tells you whether you are “hot,” “warm” or “cold?” You are usually wandering around a room while they sit laughing and saying, “you’re getting warmer,” or “cold, ICE cold…so cold you may freeze.”

WELL…the closer I get to reaching this 100 pound milestone, the more I hear this voice saying, “You’re getting hotter, you are so close…keep going, you can almost reach out and grab it.”

BUT…

…at the same time it feels like I’m trudging through mud the closer I get and it becomes THAT much harder to just reach through and claim that milestone VICTORY as mine! I want it SO bad yet at times it feels so intangible. Ay! I remember last month feeling like I had it in the bag…and then I set myself back (notice I acknowledge that I, as in me and me alone, set MYSELF back) and it took a whole month to recover.

Does it sound stupid to you when I say that although I’ve lost over 90 pounds in 7 ½ months that at times it’s still hard to believe I’m really doing this? At times it’s hard to believe that I’ve REALLY come this far? At times I look in the mirror and feel as though I don’t see a change even though my old clothes can’t be held up even with a belt anymore?

This 100 pound mark has been like my “Goliath.” Every day it comes out to taunt me and bring accusation against me and whisper lies that I CANNOT defeat it. As crazy and bizarre as it sounds, at times I’m actually afraid of this 100 pound milestone because I don’t want to just hit it, I want to surpass it far enough that even if I had an “off” week I wouldn’t find myself back in the “90 pounds lost range.” Once I shed my tears of joy and REJOICE over that great loss – I NEVER want to find myself in that place on the scale again. I will be rejoicing over the accomplishment, not over the number on the scale though. 100 pounds lost is a milestone nonetheless, BUT, it’s also just a half-way point for me.

When Goliath (from the Bible) would DAILY approach the battle line and spew his taunts, insults and accusations against the troops of Israel, the people backed away in fear. NONE of them were bold enough and recognized the victory they had in the LORD…until…David saw the enemy and recognized that “HE,” yes “HE” who is in me is GREATER, yes GREATER than this giant that stands before me…and what did David do? He didn’t lollygag around waiting for some miracle to occur…the Bible says he RAN to the battle line and he defeated this giant who had become an embarrassment to the Lord’s army. The thing that was impressed on my heart most about this story a few years back was that anytime we sit and dwell on our circumstance, we dwell on the obstacle standing in front of us – the longer we look at it, the bigger and harder it seems to overcome. The more we entertain the thought of how “weak” I am and how “great” the issue is – the less likely we are to face it head on rather the accepting defeat. David didn’t allow time for that fear to sink in causing him to cowar and come running back with his tail between his legs, NOPE, he proudly proclaimed that TODAY he was going to defeat this giant and then he ran to MAKE.IT.HAPPEN.

TODAY…I’m proclaiming that the giant that has been standing before me daily and shouting lies of doubt and defeat…THAT GIANT WILL BE DEFEATED!!!

I will claim that 100 POUNDS LOST milestone as my own and I will keep pressing through, keep running, keep lifting, keep eating right AND keep trusting that by GOD'S STRENGTH, I will make it. I just need to keep doing the things I KNOW I need to be doing in order to run to that battle line and MAKE.IT.HAPPEN!

THEN…I will be dancing like David danced…but with more clothes on...lol (2 Sam 6:14)!!!

All of YOU…my faithful encouragers and supporters…keep checking back on my side-bar (weight tracker) – I WILL reach that 100 pounds and go far beyond that!!! Thank you for all of the love, support and encouragement you’ve given and shown me. I LOVE YOU ALL!!!

Verse(s) of the Day:

1 Samuel 17:48-50
As the Philistine moved closer to attack him, David ran quickly toward the battle line to meet him. Reaching into his bag and taking out a stone, he slung it and struck the Philistine on the forehead. The stone sank into his forehead, and he fell facedown on the ground.
So David triumphed over the Philistine with a sling and a stone; without a sword in his hand he struck down the Philistine and killed him.

STRIVES TOGETHER...

You've probably all heard the popular saying, "A family that prays together, stays together." Well, I created my own family phrase:

"A family that STRIVES together, THRIVES together."

~213 POUNDS LOST~

(Mom & Dad started 2008, I started February 2009)

Weight loss is a decision YOU have to make for yourself, no one can make that decision to pursue better health and fitness for you. The amazing thing about my family is each of us made our own decisions to get healthier and in turn it's become an incredible bonding opportunity. We help keep each other accountable and are supportive in each other's healthier life-styles. No fast food is brought into my folks house. All food cooked can be eaten "worry free" by any of us without it being laden with excessive amounts of calories. As an adult who has moved out of my folks house, it's great to say I go on walks with Mom & Dad several times a week. I meet Dad at the gym in the mornings and Mom at the gym in the evenings. On our walks we often have DEEP conversations and are able to enjoy that quality time together.

The "Wright Family" is not only STRIVING towards weight loss and better health TOGETHER...but 7 1/2 months AND 213 pounds later....we are THRIVING together.

ABOUT THE VERSE: The verse below comes out of Nehemiah when he began rebuilding the wall that were broken down around Jerusalem. I have always LOVED the illustration of the verse(s) below because as the men rebuilt the wall, there was opposition from the enemy who eventually threatened to advance against them. Nehemiah set men with their weapons next to their families around the wall who continued working on the task at hand while protecting their family in the process. I think it's just such a powerful story of how we are supposed to fight for our families but we don't neglect our own "work" in the process.

Obesity, heart disease, diabeties, family genetics & heredity are ALL enemies of my family - so we MUST fight against them in order as a means of preventative maintenance. While we each have a fight that we individually can't neglect, we are "stationed at that wall," so to speak - protecting one another in the process! I LOVE IT!!!

Verse of the Day:

Nehemiah 4:13-14
Therefore I positioned men behind the lower parts of the wall, at the openings; and I set the people according to their families, with their swords, their spears, and their bows. And I looked, and arose and said to the nobles, to the leaders, and to the rest of the people, “Do not be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, great and awesome, and fight for your brethren, your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your houses.”

FORGIVE YOURSELF...

THE BIGGEST LOSER SEASON PREMIERE IS 2MORROW STARTING @ 7p CST!!!

You do NOT want to miss it!

"It's all about second chances..."

Don't wait until 2morrow to change your life, make that step today!!!

To keep in pace with the structure of my blog, as usual I will incorporate the verse of the day that is impressed on my heart. In brief, I chose this verse because this season is all about "second chances," and this scripture is about FORGIVENESS. I see a parallel between being given a second chance and being forgiven, freed or released of whatever it is that you may need that second chance for. Whether it be something attempted and failed, something you did wrong and are shown mercy or even having an unfortunate event occur such as tragedy to where you're given something to help pull you from the dark place of despair and get you back to living life - those are ALL examples of "second chances." I love this verse and feel it's incredibly relevant for my life because I have been forgiven of so much and in turn it's caused me to love with a deeper love of mercy and compassion towards others in their weakness and struggle. I allowed myself to get to the EXTREME weight I had reached, I've deeply wounded friends in my past, I've fallen short in MANY areas of life...but, I was given SECOND CHANCES. FORGIVENESS gives people a second chance to make things right - it says, "Hey look, we aren't going to dwell on what was then...I'm letting go of that and I'm hoping for something better now."

As far as weight goes...I think some of us SERIOUSLY need to take a little time out to forgive ourselves. Have you resented yourself because of past choices? Have you found yourself angry for allowing yourself to get to the weight that you are? You may have even felt as though you "hate" yourself because of how much your food choices have cost you in your life and that of your family. You HAVE to love and forgive yourself or else you will become your own worst enemy and lose your self worth.

If God has forgiven you, others have forgiven you...why is it usually so hard for us to forgive ourselves? I'm not just talking weight loss now, is there ANYTHING you are holding un-forgiveness towards YOURSELF over? That's an open question...tell me why YOU think it's hard to forgive yourself? How will you work at letting go and releasing yourself from that prison?

Verse of the day:

Luke 7:47 (The Message)

She was forgiven many, many sins, and so she is very, very grateful. If the forgiveness is minimal, the gratitude is minimal."

It's all about choices...

YOU SCREAM, I SCREAM..

WE ALL SCREAM FOR ICE CREAM!!!

Yep, you read that right! It's employee appreciation week here at my job and every year they have the ice cream truck come to the bank for us all to run like hyped up kids on SPEED once again! EVERY YEAR..I have always opted for the Cookies and Cream cup - which is laden with FAT, SUGAR & 290 CALORIES (that's almost one WHOLE meal for me)!!! This year I opted for the Frozen Fruit Strawberry bar (made with real fruit). Weighing it at (*drum roll please*) - 130 CALORIES. Now, before I get a load of hecklers -- let my preface by saying YES...it's still got sugar and HFCS in it - however, a life-style change is "ALL ABOUT CHOICES." I'd be crazy if I told you I'd never have a dinner roll, a sweet treat, MAC N CHEESE or go out for dinner again in my life...I'd be setting myself up for F.A.I.L.U.R.E.

Life really is all about choices - not just in weight loss. We choose which directions to take in life whether good or bad. We choose whether we let circumstances dictate the rest of our lives or if we dictate our circumstances. Every day it's about making a CHOICE! Faith. Work. Friends. Weight Loss. EVERY day each of us answers a question, whether conscientiously or sub-conscientiously: "Who am I?"

We answer it by our actions, our words, our habits, our goals, our passions, our RESPONSES (this is a BIG one)...and what we are willing to fight for. These past two weeks, though UP and down...have brought that daily question to the forefront of my conscience once again!

"Who am I?"

I am in love with JESUS!

I am a daughter, a sister, a friend!

I am a lover, not a fighter.

My life has purpose!

I have weaknesses and even failures - BUT I AM STRONG!

Weight loss doesn't define me. Being a "Senior Relationship Banker" doesn't define me. Honestly..."I" don't even define me anymore...

My identity is found in CHRIST! I can chase after idle things all day long...weight loss being one of them...but it may only add a few more healthier years to my life on earth...absolutely nothing eternally though. I'm redirecting my focus, RE-defining me and regaining the realization of who I truly am IN HIM!!!

I'M STEPPING UP MY GAME ONCE AGAIN...not in my own strength, but through HIM!

I'M BACCCCKKKK....*SMILE*

Verse of the Day:

Joshua 24:15 (NKJV)
And if it seems evil to you to serve the LORD, choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.”

Life Support

Hey everyone ~

I haven't been faithful in blogging lately, there has been SO MUCH going on in my life. To keep things brief - the past 3 weeks I've been learning A LOT about "balance." I feel like I've been torn in 1000 directions as my weight loss continues I'm daily being asked for tips & advice, help, etc. I LOVE that aspect of helping other people - that is something I would ultimately love to do is help others who are determined to lose weight and lose it the healthy way. At this point though I've neglected SO much by placing everyone else before my own needs. Sleeping had become almost non-existent, I went over 800 minutes on my phone plan and my email inbox has never received so many messages. It's truly been an exciting experience - yet at the same time it's been an incredibly stressful one not knowing how to properly juggle life. I've been literally at a stand-still the past month due to stress and I'm only 1 lb less than when I ended my competition on August 5th. Monday I had a breaking point and was found curled up in my bed in tears talking to a dear friend of mine. In that moment of vulnerability I learned that as much as I want to help everyone else, ultimately they've GOT to make these decisions for themselves. I can't be a source of "life support" to the wonderful people I've met and had the privilege of encouraging over these past 8 months. If I continue, this new "lifestyle" will not be sustainable to them once I back away. I'm sure you've all known someone who does something or acts a certain way JUST because they heard or saw someone else doing it? Typically that type of action isn't sustainable and only lasts for a period of time because it isn't REAL to them. Anytime we allow someone else to follow us without it really being in their own hearts yet - we are setting them up for failure. I've had to learn how to run, leap, jump and when I fall down - get back up...and I had to learn it on my own.

As I'm sitting here typing this I can't help but think about conviction. One definition for conviction is: the state of being convinced. In order for you to truly live in a certain way - you've GOT to be convinced that it is right, that it works, that it's truth, that it's possible! The testimony of another is always great - but nothing is proved more real than personal experience. At times in life we just have to step back in order for someone to have their own experience and personally grow.

Come on guys - let's grow!

In faith. In love. In hope. In LIFE.

Music has been something that has taken my hand and walked me through so many of my emotions lately. I literally listen to songs on repeat and draw near to God as I'm crying out in prayer. Like I mentioned above, finding a balance in life has been incredibly difficult lately and I've been struggling in so many areas. The song I poured my heart out to in the car the other night goes like this:

Album: My Paper Heart
Artist: Francesca Battistelli

You may think
I’m just fine
How could anything
Ever be out of line?

I take my time
To set the stage
To make sure everything
Is all in place

Even though I’ve got the lines rehearsed
A picture only paints a thousand words

(Chorus)
Things aren’t always what they seem
You’re only seeing part of me
There’s more than you could ever know
Behind the scenes
I’m incomplete and I’m undone
But I suppose like everyone
There’s so much more that’s going on
Behind the scenes

Sometimes I can’t see
Anything
Through the dark
Surrounding me
And at times I’m unsure
About the ground
Beneath my feet
If it’s safe and sound

When it’s hard to find hope in the unseen
I have peace in knowing it will find me

Verse of the Day:

Matthew 6:6
But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.